torture tests

(Amelia staring at the fish in the Bass store)


Spring Break is flying by. Although there are moments that are confusing me. I have tried to plan something sort of fun for the kids everyday. Monday they chose "sit around and play video games or watch tv and do nothing" day. I said okay but first let's go to the library. They said fine but they weren't reading anything this week so what was the point?

Hmmm....... no library. They had a fun, relaxing day and I didn't have to get out of my jammies so I guess it was a win-win.

Tuesday. This is where things get confusing. I took them swimming to a wicked fun huge wave pool. Swimming is hard for me on so many levels. One, I hate wearing a swimsuit. Not so much that I will refuse to go but just enough to dread it.

Two, I have to stay with Amelia every second and I can't sit in the hot tub for three glorious hours. It is exhausting when the wee child has the attention span of a gnat. She LOVES to swim, more than anything in the universe. This is how the afternoon went:

I want to go in the waves now.

Ok

I want to go on the red slide now.

Ok

I want to go on the green slide now.

Ok

I want to go in the kiddie pool now.

Ok

I want to go back in the waves now.

Ok

I want to go in the hot tub now.

Ok

I want to go on the splash park and run everywhere as fast as I can even though you told me I wasn't allowed to run or I may get hurt at least 100 times but I'm choosing to ignore your good advice because I have so much to do and so very, apparently, little time to do it in.

Um, ok.

Every activity lasted 2 minutes and 13 seconds. Three hours at the pool felt like 30 and I was so wasted when I got home. She is super cute at the pool though and someone told me once that that's what it's all about.

Ok.

Now, I know that didn't seem confusing but I'm getting there. On the agenda for Wednesday was the mall. Not just any mall. The Balzac mall. Dun dun dun.

My kids love the Balzac mall, or so they think. It's a great mall, I won't begrudge them that. What my kids don't know is that they actually hate the mall. And I hate shopping, I avoid it at every cost. They want to spend all their money just because they have some and I refuse them their every desire.

"No, you can't have that because the price is outrageous and you are only 11 and I have to protect you from the evils of commercialism".

"It's too short."

"It's too tight."

"It's too grown up"

"It's too........I don't know....... It's just too, all right, now put it back."

"I know it's your money but I said no and that's that."

"Hey let's go in here" (a grown up store that caters to women. They all groan simultaneously). Apparently they aren't here to shop for me. Who knew?

Three hours at the mall flies by. Before we know it we are exhausted, spent, broke, crabby, picking on each other, begging for treats and ready to go home. But for some reason, every break from school they get they want to go back. Huh?

Swimming = fun = slow motion

Shopping = torture = mach time speed

See my confusion? I simply don't understand it. They both hold the same level of torture for me. And it's always the same. Except at the beach. I can spend all day every day at the beach and never once feel as though it's a torture test.

Oh well, what can you do? On the whole, spring break is flying. I wish it would slow down. I love the laying in my bed and reading until 10 part.

Tomorrow I go off facebook for a month. I want to develop some other skills and hobbies since I feel as though I have mastered the art of facebook. Minus the games, I have never once played a facebook game and I'm proud of it.

I may take up blogging three times a day.

Just kidding.

Stay tuned for the low down on vegetarian month. What a great month, but.........

tomorrow I eat meat!