cranky catherine

Last night I got a text at 3:30 in the morning. It was from Telus. They wanted me to know that I could upgrade my phone for free. Clearly, it was important that I have this information so they sent it to me asap which happened to be at 3:30 am.

At 4:30 am when I was still lying in my bed, down right p****d off that I was awake, I decided to text them back knowing perfectly well that no one was going to receive it and if they did no one was going to give a rats @$$. I did it anyway. I am not rational at that hour.

At 5:30 in the morning I decided to get up and watch some House Hunters but before I did I thought I'd give sleep one more shot because, after all, I was TIRED!

I dozed off and dreamt about Angi Gerrie making the yummiest dip that had the perfect amount of spice in it. A dip that was to be eaten with corn tortilla chips. For obvious reasons.

The man got up at 6:30. I don't know why. The birds weren't even pecking. Do you think I have finally beat them at their own game? It probably doesn't make any difference to the house buying world that my house now looks like this.....



In case you are wondering, those are the lids off cans of black beans and chick peas and other sundry canned goods. The lids are covering up holes that have been completely pecked through in the cedar siding. Doesn't everyone want to live in a house that has so obvious a bird pecking problem?

Geez Louise.

I practically live in a can of black beans. How ironic. Or maybe it's not.

After the birds finally figured out that I wasn't about to let them nest in my house they stopped pecking. I thought they were gone but then new birds started the pecking around the side of the house. The man bought a gun. Of the bb variety. It has terrible aim and hit everything we shot at except the flipping birds. So I started covering those holes too. I only had to cover two. All day yesterday and this morning there has been no pecking.

Could it be?

I doubt it, but what baffles me the most is that there are no useful, handy, inexpensive remedies for this particular problem I am having. It is going to cost me $200 to buy what I need to remedy the problem for good. Which I will have to buy off the internet and then wait for it to come. This is not convenient. Not to mention all the boards we have to replace and paint again.

We already did that.

I hate Willacy. Finally, my love for this house has been quashed by my disdain for the problems this house is giving my head and butt and side.

Oh, did I mention that the roof HAS to be repaired in its entirety as well? If the man does it himself it will only cost us $4000.

Sure no problem. Let me write you a check.

I hate Willacy. And now, or at least as of 3:30 this morning, I remembered how much I hate Telus as well.

And I have PMS, which I hate. Telus obviously didn't get the memo. It wasn't so bad this month but today will be interesting since tired and PMS don't really go well together around here. I can't wait to be done with them forever more.

Telus that is. And PMS for that matter.